18 May
18May

The Old Place and the New Place 

Like Nancy, “Janine” and her husband moved to a Life Plan Community from their much larger house. The old house had 1300 square feet of living space, a lower level with an additional 1200 square foot (used for a library, music room, art studio, and guest room), a two-car garage “that never saw a car” but served “admirably as a workshop for several messy hobbies, tools, and equipment,” and an unheated storage place underneath the garage. The new home is 1545 sf, with a one car garage and quite limited storage. 

About a year prior to moving, they’d gotten on a waiting list for a unit, with one becoming available nine months later. They had about three months’ lead time to prepare for the move, during which the unit was refreshed and updated according to their wishes.  They anticipate staying in this community “till the end” although they may need to change units within the community if their health necessitates it. The community offers both assisted living and nursing care, if needed. Currently, like Janine and her husband, 90% of the residents live independently. 


Downsizing Habits over the Years

Janine describes herself as someone with “a tendency to hang on to things.” Earlier in life, it was mainly books and records, but she lost a lot of possessions when she left them in storage and then was unable to come back and collect them. With a hint of nostalgia, she notes, “It was so long ago that I don’t think about it.” 

Retirement allowed her to shed herself of some clothes. She’s kept jewelry because it doesn’t take up much room. As for other categories of items, “I’d say that over the years I did some period purging, but that was offset by continued acquisition of furniture, art, and hobby materials.” 

Family archives have not been an issue—what she had she gave her brother, who was more interested in them, noting that she had no children of her own who might have wanted these. She’s kept some photos for her own pleasure. Janine did hang onto her grandmother’s desk, and “because it could be moved while full, I didn’t go through it meticulously.” 

She has kept about two boxes of travel souvenirs and maps as well as some Christmas cards, but managed to “dispose most of the remnants of my thirty-year library career.” 

Downsizing for the Move 

Janine says that since she works best with a deadline, had no idea how long they would be on the waiting list, and pursued other interests during the pandemic, she didn’t do any major downsizing until after deciding to take the unit and making the decisions about renovations. 

Janine said she and her husband, “Matthew” divided up the job. “Matthew is more of a planner, and I’m more organic.  Matthew .…[had] a lot of tools and two very space intensive hobbies. I had by far the bigger accumulation, including musical instruments and music, marbling equipment and supplies, other arts & crafts materials, and still quite a lot of books and CDs. We made joint decisions on furniture, which was pretty easy and based on the known dimensions of our new space. He took the initiative to dispose of things, which included selling quite a lot of stuff on Facebook Marketplace and a couple of local outlets. We also staged garage sales on two weekends, which got rid of a lot of excess linens, kitchen items, tools, tchotchkes, etc. We probably took in about $5000 total from all the things we sold. We had no professional help until the very end, when we paid ‘Junk Recyclers’ to take what we hadn’t dealt with.”   

The Hard Parts 

Janine and Matthew had different responses to their possessions. “For example, after about ten years of working in stained glass, Matthew had gradually gotten away from it. He was able to make a clear decision that he was done with that and proceeded to sell an extensive collection of tools, equipment, supplies and actual glass as a package to a would-be stained glass artist. “We filled up the entirety of this woman’s SUV and waved goodbye. I was kind of sad, but he was fine!  We did keep several of the pieces he had made, and the rest went quickly in the garage sale.  (At clearance prices!) 

“The most notable thing I had to get rid of was my mother’s piano, an amazing 1936 Steinway Model B. In truth, I’d been feeling guilty about hanging on to it for so many years since I don’t really play.” There was no room for it in the new place and no relatives had room for it either. “In the end it came down to two choices - selling it to a firm that would have restored it and resold it, or selling it to a piano dealer, who wanted to restore it and keep it as his personal primary instrument.” Janine opted for the latter, “knowing that while I wasn’t getting a lot of money, it was going to a loving home and that I had a visitation promised when the restoration is completed.  (Kind of like an open adoption!)” 


Her Best “Trick” 

“Because we were moving to a much smaller home, I did more detailed space planning that I ever had before. I knew, for instance, that I’d have to make use of vertical storage for lots of arts and crafts supplies. I bought two tall shelving units and storage baskets and organized that material as I packed it.  Then, after moving, a good deal of stuff was already pre-organized.” 


Regrets 

Janine had few regrets about the way she handled things. “My only regret is that there were some categories of things I didn’t purge at all because they weren’t a space issue. A lifetime’s accumulation of jewelry?  It’s all in a jewelry armoire - just move it as is.  There were a few categories like that.  I will get to them on the slow downsizing model, though I’m not sure when!” She also reporting keeping too many office supplies, like empty file folders. 

Changing Views about “Stuff” 

Janine has moved a number of times in her life. I wondered whether she thought differently about “stuff” now. She said, “The inevitable advancing of age has certainly changed my perspective. For most of my life I could think ‘well, someday I might learn to play that viola.’  Now, moving at age 70, I was able to let go of many things that I realized were no longer relevant and likely never would be. The relative physical size of the ‘stuff’ still played a role, though.  No question at all that I had to sell my mother’s grand piano. My equally neglected flute?  Well, it doesn’t take up much space, and there might be chamber music people in my new community.” 

Advice for Others Moving to Smaller Place  

“What helped me the most was finding an outfit called “X [name of city] Junk Recyclers.” They will take away most anything, for a very reasonable price, and they aim to keep 80% of it out of the landfill. They partner with a place that restores or upcycles all manner of ’stuff’ and then sell it in a large thrift store. There were a lot of things that I just couldn’t throw in the trash, and this relieved me of that angst.”    

Questioning No Longer Relevant Collections of Items 

“There is one personal insight which wasn’t new but was reinforced dramatically in this last move. I’ve long known that I tended to form and keep ‘collections’ that reflected my sense of identity in a particular period. One the hardest things for me to part with was a sizable collection of books on dance history and criticism, which was a particular passion of mine in my twenties and thirties. But I finally admitted that this is no longer a big part of my life; I haven’t lived anywhere with a major dance scene in decades, and I haven’t looked at these books in a long time. At first, I thought, well I’ll just keep a few that relate to Balanchine and the NYC Ballet. But I gave up even that in the end and donated the whole lot, keeping only one volume that is fairly old and autographed by the author, and so might actually be worth something.  There are other examples. 

“At some point, I may have to admit that I’m no longer a marbler or a bookbinder, and (oh no!) may no longer be involved in choral and community singing. I’m hoping that won’t come for a good number of years since I’m sure not ready to give those up yet! I aspire to growing more content with my identity and purpose, without needing the support of so many artifacts.”  

Conclusions 

Although, like Nancy, Janine moved from a large house to a much smaller place in a Life Plan Community and had to move on relatively short notice, their downsizing stories diverged in several key ways. Unlike Nancy, Janine had a partner who could participate in the process and who had planning skills that complemented Janine’s more “organic” approach. Family archives figured more prominently in Nancy’s story, and she spent considerable time prior to her latest move sorting through these. Janine’s challenge was parting with hobby-related materials although in the end she was able to let go of larger items (like the piano) and “collections” she realized she no longer used or had an interest in. She came up with a creative, space-saving solution for her arts materials. Janine and Matthew also appeared to have more positive experiences with selling their possessions than did Nancy. 

What strikes me in both stories is the need to make hard decisions, overcome emotional obstacles to letting go, and consider a multi-prong approach to disposing of one’s things. As someone with move in my future, I was heartened to see examples of people with a lot of interests who are still able to fit their lives into smaller spaces.

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